NICOLE ANDREWS

Age: 26

Hometown: Sunnyvale, CA

Generation: 4th - Yonsei, 5th - Gosei

Biography: Nicole Andrews grew up in the Bay Area, but completed her undergraduate education at UCLA. She is currently finishing her last year at the UCSF School of Pharmacy with future pursuits of becoming a critical care pharmacist. On the weekends, Nicole enjoys spending time and watching the Warriors with her best friends, her Jiichanand Baachan. Nicole’s hobbies include growing succulents, drawing, and drinking coffee. She attributes her stable mental health to her pet rabbit and study buddy, Momo. 

Name of Piece: I Am Anxious

This piece represents more of an action than a concept. As someone who suffers from depression, handling multiple tasks or even the smallest to-dos can be very anxiety-inducing. I describe my depression as “I think too quickly.” My brain fixates on a negative thought and begins firing off similar negative thoughts at a million times per second, much faster than I can process, and sends me into an overwhelming downhill spiral. My mental state is constantly in both flux and overdrive—I have difficulty slowing it down. So sometimes, it is the action of thoughtless inaction that is most calming. When my brain starts to fire too fast, I draw lines. The lines have some structure, but minimal intention. The lines go from one end to the other—no real route and no real idea. The lines are a combination of anxiety vs. control, clutter vs. order, obsession vs. imperfection. These lines represent my mental state, or at least my attempt to calm my mental state. I titled the piece “I Am Anxious” because I was in a very anxious state during its creation. I am still anxious right now. But that is mental health.